Like many other Christian women, I believe Proverbs 31 is God's written form of standards for his daughters in Christ. I, myself, desire to be a virtuous woman, and if you truly are a woman of God, you, too, will be burdened with this desire.
Some critics declare that the the Proverbs 31 guidelines are out of date; that it is no longer applicable to our modern lives. I would have to disagree. Because I believe that God's Word stands the test of time, I have created a set of guidelines on how to become a virtuous woman, even in modern society.
1. You must have faith. Proverbs 31:30 says, " Favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised." God expects us to serve him with all of our heart, mind, and soul. We must seek his will for our life, and never stray from following his ways. The context of this passage equates physical beauty with vanity, which brings me to my next point.
2. You must possess inner beauty. Proverbs 31:26 says, "She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness." One possesses inner beauty through seeking God's wisdom, and by following his greatest commandment-- to love others above ourselves. How can we exhibit this demonstration of unconditional love?
3. You must be generous. Proverbs 31:20 says, "She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hand to the needy." We must be joyful givers in all we do. We are told to give willingly, but also to manage our finances wisely.
4. You must spend wisely. Proverbs 31:11 says, "The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil." If you are married, or in a domestic partnership, you must seek approval from your husband before making any financial decisions. Learn to budget, and spend wisely. Cut coupons if you have to. Help relieve your partner of financial burdens-- do not become one! Take the time. It will be worth it.
5. You must use your time wisely. In Proverbs 31:15 it says, "She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens." A virtuous woman works diligently to complete her daily tasks without complaint. We must not waste time dwelling on things that do not please the Lord.
6. You must respect and love your husband. In Proverbs 31:12 it says, "She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life." Cook, clean, and care for your husband. A man with dirty clothes is a man whose wife does not love him. Never argue in public, and never discuss your marital issues with anyone other than your partner. This, I myself have learned the hard way.
7. You must respect and love yourself. In Proverbs 31:22 it says, "She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple." Proverbs 31:25 further says, "Strength and honor are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come." A virtuous woman of God puts thought into her appearance. Her inner and outer beauty are harmonious. We must be modest, humble, and prudent. We are priceless treasures, valued by God himself, and we must treat our bodies thusly.
8. You must be a homemaker. In Proverbs 31:27 it says, "She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness." We must create a warm, welcoming environment for both our families and friends. Does your husband come home to a warm embrace, and food on the table, or does he come home to a bitter, nagging woman? Proverbs 25:4 says, "Better to live on the corner of a rooftop than to share a wide house with a nagging wife." Make your home a place where your husband and children can relax and recharge; a place where they can relieve themselves of the day's burdens.
9. You must be a good mother. In Proverbs 31:28 it says, "Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her." We must teach our children the way of the Lord, and care for their needs always. Proverbs 22:6 says, "Train up a child in the way he should go,
And when he is old he will not depart from it." Is it not one of your deepest desires for your child to grow up in the Lord, and keep his ways always? This is an early way to plant the seed of salvation in your child. Never let them see you contradicting God's word. Who you are at church in front of others should be who you are at home.
10. You must always be prepared. In Proverbs 31:21 it says, "She is not afraid of the snow for her household; for all her household are clothed with scarlet (warm clothing.)" Proverbs 21:18b says, "...her candle goeth not out by night." Do not just focus on preparing for the day for materialistic purposes. Live a purpose-driven life. Prepare for the day's spiritual battled by praying and seeking God's face as soon as you wake up. Ask for his favor, and seek his wisdom. He will bless you and all of your household. You will never be found wanting.
Proverbs 31:10- "Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is FAR above rubies.
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