We exist in a world today where a war of power continually wages between men and women. We demand equal gender pay, the right to show off our bodies, and we declare independence. We are taught to use our sexuality as a means for expression. To me, this does not sound like freedom, but rather carnal captivity; bound by the chains of sexual immorality, vanity, and pride.
This fight for equality has taken a turn for the worst. Women no longer want to be equal with men. They want to control and manipulate them as tools for their own personal gain and pleasure. They want to be the head, but what does the Bible say?
Ephesians 5:23-24 says, "For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing."
The husband is to be the "head," of the wife, but what does this mean? Should a woman live in the shadow of her husband, quiet, without a voice to be heard? God forbid. To better understand our roles as wives, we need to understand submission.
Submission in the Biblical context is synonymous with the word amenable, which means, "willing to do something, or agree with someone."
Submission is not forced. It is a choice--a responsibility, rather, not his right. Deciding WHEN and HOW to submit is a woman's calling in a Christian marriage. When we have a healthy Christian marriage, the focus should never be on our rights, but rather personal accountability and responsibility. The husband's responsibility is to be affectionate, and to love sacrificially as Christ loved the Church-- not to make his wife submit.
Why does God want us to be submissive?
1 Peter 3:1 says, "Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives."
You see, God trusts us as women to be counselors, and spiritual guides for our husbands. We are held accountable to strengthen our husband's faith through our reverence for God's Word!
Verses 3-6 then say, "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear."
We are to use discernment of when to submit to our husband's will, and when not to. As long as our husband's will coincides with the Lord's, we are to be agreeable; we are to be submissive to God's will being established through our husbands. This is glorifying to God.
Our submissiveness does not just gain us favor with the Lord, but it also helps our husbands to gain favor and influence with other people.
Proverbs 31:23-25 says, "Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them,and supplies the merchants with sashes.
She is clothed with strength and dignity: she can laugh at the days to come."
The Proverbs 31 woman's husband was revered because of the actions of his wife. Her actions of submissiveness was an outward glance of what the inside of their home was like. She empowered and enabled him to be the man God needed him to be. Will you do the same for your husband? Will you be submissive for your God?
Ask yourself this question: “What can I start doing that will help my husband be the man of influence God is calling him to be?”
Wives, pray for your husbands, and pray for discernment so that you may know when his will equates with God's will. For the woman whose husband is not up to par with God just yet, let your actions reflect Christ in you. In return you will gain him for the Lord and for the Kingdom; your heart's greatest desire.
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